Managing and Modifying Child Custody Schedules During the Holidays

For many people, the greatest joy of the holiday season is spending time with children. If you have a minor son or daughter and live apart from your co-parent, this time of year also presents challenges. Custody agreements include rules for holidays, but whether you are the primary residential parent or the alternative residential parent, flexibility and schedule adjustments might be necessary. Along with family celebrations during holiday time, there are also special occasions like office work parties, school plays, last-minute shopping trips and religious observances that could not be foreseen when custody terms were negotiated.

There are many practical approaches that can be used when adhering to the standard calendar for Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s and other holidays becomes difficult, such as:

• Document everything — Even if you’re on very friendly terms with your ex, your custody arrangement is an enforceable legal order. Though it might seem easier to handle quick changes with a phone call or text, you should make and keep a written or electronic record of every requested deviation from the parenting plan, along with the other party’s approval. In some cases, parenting apps make this relatively simple.
• Schedule prompt substitutions — If a long-lost family member is coming in on a certain day when your child normally would not be with you, offer specific, equivalent dates and times from your custody period as a substitution. Likewise, try to find a fair makeup when you are unable to watch your son or daughter during an assigned time.
• Maintain the holiday spirit — Sometimes, there is no solution that works for both parents. This could occur if each one has an important holiday event at the same time. In these instances, you must honor the language of the parenting plan, while remembering that the most important thing is to focus on your children rather than giving in to your emotions.

Mixing these strategies helps you adjust to last-minute events while protecting your child’s holiday cheer. When seasonal event changes require formal updates to your parenting plan, a revised order must be presented to the court for approval.

Consulting an experienced Tennessee family law attorney can help you deal with unexpected custody challenges that arise during the holidays and other times. By planning ahead and using legal guidance when needed, you can usually avoid stressful conflicts.

The Collierville Law Firm in Tennessee assists parents in child custody matters, including divorce proceedings and post-order modification requests. For a free initial consultation, please call 901-614-0318 or contact us online.